Well today is the 1 year anniversary of my Grandmother's passing. I think we can learn a lot from those around us. She was a strong woman and remains that way in my mind. I can hear her voice in my head when I begin any sort of downward spiral with a negative thought telling me to get off my "butt". Militza Shoshin, her name even sounds like a motivation to not mess with her. My lingering thought - nature or nuture, because she was a strong woman and through adverse environmental threats had a will like none other (except mom) -for this I hope I have the same "will". I have been told I am strong willed (no snickering) and can only believe with the guidance and pushing : ) of my mother, father and grandmother that I will remain strong when faced with one of life's challenges (example - divorce).
I know that my Grandmother is looking on me today shaking her head wishing I wouldn't have to endure any pain, just as my heart goes to those who have braved divorce before me and after. In the same respect she is telling me to eat my vegetables, be healthy don't be lazy and remember I love you. I can hear her call me by my nickname Katusha telling me to pick myself up and move on. Simple advice, but it rings true to most of life's challenges doesn't it. All of this reminds me that I am fortunate to have a family that cares.
It is impressive to know that people before you have endured whatever life threw at them. At the same time it is difficult to truly learn and understand thoroughly what knowledge they impart to us about the lessons they learned. We truly have to walk a mile in the shoes of each experience to appreciate the gravity and to learn and grow from the life lesson.
To my Grandmother I would like to say cheers! You have monumentally influenced my life and I know you would gain pleasure knowing that I can still hear your voice in my head telling me what to do and not to do : )! I love you.
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Tuesday, December 15, 2009
Sunday, December 13, 2009
Cupids Road Kill
Okay... so today I had to go to my old house... and pick up paint cans and some random "stuff" that my last roomate (soon to be ex-husband) didn't want to remove. Yeah thats right, he didn't feel like it... NOT actually internalizing that I haven't been there for 9 months...
Now it isn't the act of picking up the random junk - I had great friends to help.
It is that he is still trying to control the situation. How do we both move past the the pratices that brought us to our divorce in the first place. The point is the ridiculousness of having his attorney email me "organizing" me to come and pick up paint cans, becuase he doesn't want to ... I can't imagine what we both spent financially for our attorneys to email and forward our communication.
CAN ANYONE TELL ME WHY TWO GROWN PROFESSIONAL ADULTS COMMUNICATE LIKE THIS? and why are the people who feed on the scraps of these arguments and charge for it. I understand why attorneys exist, but for a situation like ours - limited assets and no children, it should be easy.
Well thanks to my girlfriends who helped me out... I can only say that going to sleep tonight, I am glad this soon will come to an end.
Now it isn't the act of picking up the random junk - I had great friends to help.
It is that he is still trying to control the situation. How do we both move past the the pratices that brought us to our divorce in the first place. The point is the ridiculousness of having his attorney email me "organizing" me to come and pick up paint cans, becuase he doesn't want to ... I can't imagine what we both spent financially for our attorneys to email and forward our communication.
CAN ANYONE TELL ME WHY TWO GROWN PROFESSIONAL ADULTS COMMUNICATE LIKE THIS? and why are the people who feed on the scraps of these arguments and charge for it. I understand why attorneys exist, but for a situation like ours - limited assets and no children, it should be easy.
Well thanks to my girlfriends who helped me out... I can only say that going to sleep tonight, I am glad this soon will come to an end.
Saturday, December 12, 2009
Cupid's Bent Arrow
Saturday, December 12
Decided to start writing about my divorce process... One thing I have chosen to change.. the term in which we all have accustomed to hearing... "Ex-husband"... I refer to my soon to be ex-husband as my last roommate. He was in fact my live-in boyfriend for much longer than the title of husband. I want a show of hands... who HATES the complications that the divorce process can bring.
I remember speaking to my attorney in the beginning and totally approaching this like a woman would, with feelings. Her comment to me, think of this like a business contract... really... REALLY... where was that in wedding manual. SUCH CRAP. So ladies, I am not a marriage hater, nor man hater - I love men... have you seen MATT DAMON! But my point is, even though we are supposed to be married for love, we divorce by way of business savviness?
Just as an add... you need to be savvy with your attorney as well! There are a few things I am happy with and a few things I am not... but I guess we call that a learning curve.
Feel free to add your comments!!!
Decided to start writing about my divorce process... One thing I have chosen to change.. the term in which we all have accustomed to hearing... "Ex-husband"... I refer to my soon to be ex-husband as my last roommate. He was in fact my live-in boyfriend for much longer than the title of husband. I want a show of hands... who HATES the complications that the divorce process can bring.
I remember speaking to my attorney in the beginning and totally approaching this like a woman would, with feelings. Her comment to me, think of this like a business contract... really... REALLY... where was that in wedding manual. SUCH CRAP. So ladies, I am not a marriage hater, nor man hater - I love men... have you seen MATT DAMON! But my point is, even though we are supposed to be married for love, we divorce by way of business savviness?
Just as an add... you need to be savvy with your attorney as well! There are a few things I am happy with and a few things I am not... but I guess we call that a learning curve.
Feel free to add your comments!!!
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